Imagine you and me
by lynnmichelle
Summary: DISCONTINUED - Sam has feelings for Jack and thinks he may have feelings for her too. But they live in a world where they can't be together because of their sense of honor. Sound familiar? All might not be as it originally appears. Chapter 5 up.
1. Chapter 1

A/N - This story is written as thanks to everyone who nominated "Instant Message" in the Stargate Fan Awards. It means so much to me that people not only took time to read and review that fic but to nominate it for an award - that's truly awesome. So I hope you all enjoy taking this journey with Jack, Sam and I.

**Imagine you and me**

**Prologue**

Samantha Carter sat staring at her computer screen as if the fate of the world depended upon the words that were found there. At least that's what it would have looked like if anyone had walked past her lab on that cold day in February. In actuality, she had just received another in the string of e-mails that had gone back and forth between her and Jack O'Neill. They centered on the topic of flowers and why he hadn't sent any to her on that day of designated flower giving. The e-mail's had quickly deteriorated into a series of witty one liners which were sent mere minutes apart.

She had laughed out loud when she had seen the most recent response which begged her to forgive him for being so unappreciative of her and offering up a collection of baseball cards which sat in his desk drawer as a sign of his affection. That or the bottle of Whiskey that lay next to the cards!

These events had led to her current state of staring which was, in fact, daydreaming. Without her realizing, the words from Jack's e-mail had blurred before her eyes as her mind wandered to a subconscious fantasy.

She was at some kind of military ball and was there on Jack's arm. He was in his dress blues while she wore a beautiful flowing gown that set off her eyes, which were already bright with happiness. They were laughing as General Hammond said something they both found amusing and Jack looked down at her lovingly, pulling her closer to him in an action that was both protective and possessive at the same time. And as her mind wandered further, she watched herself as the General moved away to speak with another guest, revealing her swollen pregnant belly.

In reality, the Sam Carter who sat in her lab, felt a warm feeling spread through her as she saw the vision that her mind had conjured up, and she smiled what could only be described as a goofy smile. It was in this position that Dr. Daniel Jackson found her.

"Sam?" he questioned, waiting for her to look up. "Sam", he repeated when she didn't answer him. "SAM!", he finally yelled and she literally jumped, surprised by his presence. Seconds later a guilty look appeared on her face and Daniel wondered what she'd been doing. Deciding that it was probably none of his business, he didn't ask, instead smiling at the woman of whom he had grown so fond.

"Do you want to join me for lunch? I don't want a repeat of yesterday", he said in a mock stern tone, referring to her skipping lunch and substituting it for a fat free cake and a cup of coffee at 15:30 hours.

"Sure", she answered, smiling back at her friend and colleague. "I'll be there in five minutes".

She watched him leave and then turned back to the e-mail, once again finding the words fully in focus. She shook her head at her own childish fantasies as she locked the screen on her computer. Sam knew that nothing could ever happen between her and Jack and for a moment was envious of the Sam and Jack that they had encountered through the Quantum Mirror. They, at least, had the choice of being together if their feelings and desires drove them in that direction. In her reality that option just did not exist.

For in her reality, Dr. Samantha Carter and General Jack O'Neill had made their life choices before they had ever met. Which was why outside of Cheyenne Mountain Sam was also known as Mrs. Pete Shanahan and Mrs. Sara O'Neill didn't even know that she existed.

A/N - BTW, did I mention this is an AU fic? Is that ok with everyone - will you still read it? I hope so :-)


	2. The Story of Sam and Pete

**Chapter 2– The story of Sam and Pete**

_A/N – Have faith one and all. This is a Sam/Jack fic but take it from me, you NEED some background into the Sam/Pete relationship and this is it for now. Thanks to everyine one who reviewed the prologue._

Sam lay in bed, trying to figure out what the hell was wrong with her. She was a happily married woman, married to Pete who was a really great guy. They had been together forever and that was how it was supposed to stay.

She had met him a month after she had celebrated her seventeenth birthday. She had just graduated from High School and was looking forward to a summer of travel and fun before she started her sophomore year of college. She'd already completed her freshman year while still in high school a fact that she always kept to herself when she met a guy for the first time.

Mark had brought Pete to their house one evening early in July, a friend he had met during his junior year at the state school which he attended. Sam and he had hit it off right away. He was witty and he made her laugh, honestly and often. He was smart, not as clever as she, but Sam had found that in her short life few people were. However, they held intelligent conversations about things that mattered to her like movies, current affairs and politics. He even tried to listen when she talked in graphic details about the latest experiments on which she was working.

Most importantly he made her feel like she was the center of his universe. And Samantha Carter fell in love for the first time in her life.

They dated that summer, neither willing to commit to each other, while at the same time not dating anyone else. The night that Pete told her that he loved her, while they lay on a blanket in the park, staring up at the stars, was one of the most special nights of her life.

The next night she broke it off with him as tears streamed down her face, choking out between sobs that she would rather lose him then and there on her terms than lose him later when he realized he no longer loved her. He had pulled her close and whispered soothing words of comfort into her hair, trying to reassure her that he had no intention of leaving her. And as her heart swelled with love, she believed him.

Throughout their college days, they were a couple. Whenever he was in town, they were inseperable and when he wasn't they spoke everyday on the phone. When she went to DC for her summer internship, he followed, finding a great apartment and asking her to move in with him. When she returned to school in the fall she missed him terribly but he insisted that she still needed a social life even if it didn't include him.

Every once in a while he would surprise her with a heartfelt letter written either neatly or poorly. She later understood that the poorly written ones had been penned when he had one too many beers and was desperately lonely without her no matter how many parties his frat friends dragged him to.

One day in her senior year she received a letter from him that was unusually bulky. It bore a Washington DC postmark, the first letter he had sent to her since he had joined the police department there after graduation. Sam hadn't wanted him to move so far away but he insisted that since her dream was to work at the Pentagon, a dream born from her hope to make her father happy while not needing to actually join the military, that he'd do everything possible to help her realize it.

She opened the envelope, quickly tearing at the paper, and pulled out the contents in one swift move. She unfolded the letter and found a plane ticket held within the white folds. She quickly scanned his note, an invitation for her to join in him DC for the holidays, and at that moment she knew that Pete would be the man she would marry.

It took five more years and numerous break-ups and make-ups, but on her twenty-fifth birthday Pete Shanahan bent down on one knee and asked Samantha Carter, the most beautiful, kind-hearted woman he'd ever met, soon to be Doctor of Astrophysics, to marry him. Without hesitation she accepted his proposal knowing that she was the happiest, luckiest woman on earth.

Her life had been so simple then. But that was before her daughter was born. Before her career became more successful and time-absorbing than her husbands. Before she worked at the SGC and learned that we were not alone in the Universe. Before seven years had passed.

And as she lay staring up at her bedroom ceiling as her husband lay sleeping beside her, she admitted to herself that the moment things got really complicated was the moment that she met Jack O'Neill.

_A/N Please stay with this with me. The next chap will be back to Sam and Jack and a progression from the prologue and I promise that I'll try to get the updates done more frequently - I'll just ignore real life._


	3. The Office Christmas Party

**Chapter 3 – The Office Christmas Party**

A/N – I know that a lot of people don't like the whole Sam/Pete relationship but wow I didn't realize you all hated it that much. So many of you read the last chapter, but so few of you reviewed it, that I'm wondering if I should continue this fic at all considering there will be mention of Pete a lot since she's married to him even though it is a Sam/Jack fic.

With that in mind though, here's more of what's to come and then let me know.

ssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss

Light was seeping through the blind in the bedroom signaling the dawn of another day for Dr. Samantha Carter. She had woken early, awakened by the confusion of another erotic dream involving Jack O'Neill. She lay still, trying not to disturb her husband, and attempted to pinpoint exactly when her feelings had changed from purely collegial to something … more, for Jack.

They had become confidants pretty early on in her time at the SGC, with him becoming her 'go to person' when she needed advice, especially when it involved base politics and how to handle tricky situations. He was open and honest with her and she genuinely liked the man. She never felt the need to look at him with fear or reverence, two of the many emotions that were often associated with him by military and civilians alike. It had never been that way for Sam. He was simply another person that she worked with and if he was a hero who was politically powerful within the arena of Homeworld Security, so be it.

But when had things gone from this to something more? The Christmas party? Maybe. She could definitely remember some pretty major flirtation between them that night.

Sam had only been at the bar where the party was being held for a short while before people were asking her if she knew where General O'Neill was since he had yet to arrive. She found it amusing that the military contingent of the SGC were asking her, of all people, where their fearless leader was hiding out.

Even though she was a civilian contractor, she was the lead scientist assigned to work on SG-1, either to assist in off world missions or to perform research on the alien artifacts that the team brought back to Earth. She also worked with the other lead SG teams as the need arose. This meant that even though she was an outsider, being non-military, she worked so closely with her teams that she was viewed as one of the guys.

When they went out for drinks after either a really great or truly awful mission, she was invited. Other scientists were jealous of the way she had been accepted after such a short amount of time, especially since most of them had been there for years and were never asked to socialize with the combat teams.

Sam walked up to the bar to get another drink and while she waited for the barman to make her cosmopolitan she surreptitiously pulled out her government issued Blackberry and e-mailed the General, knowing from experience that no matter where he was, the Blackberry would be housed in it's cradle attached to his belt, whether in full dress blues, BDU's or in civvies. Using her thumbs, she quickly composed an e-mail to Jack.

**_Where are you? If you're not careful I'll be sozzled before you get here._**

She took a couple of seconds to check her spelling, especially of the word that her Anglo-Irish Mom used to use to describe when she had one too many glasses of wine, and depressed the button on the side of the device to send her note. She turned back to the bar as she slipped her Blackberry back in its cradle which hung from the inside pocket of her purse. She picked up her drink, smiling at that barman in thanks at the same time.

She scanned the room and found the group that she really wanted to hang out with that evening which was made up of Dr. Daniel Jackson, Lieutenant Colonel Cameron Mitchell and Teal'c of SG-1 and Dr. Janet Frasier, the base's Chief Medical Officer and Sam's best friend at work. She made her way through the melee of people saying Hello to those who made eye contact with her as she walked. Everyone was dressed in civilian clothing, for the most part very nice clothing, but she could still easily recognize the military within the group. Haircuts couldn't lie!

For some reason she couldn't explain to herself, let alone her husband, Sam had wanted to look particularly nice for the party. She had gone to the hairdresser to have her hair blow dried and it was shaped in all the right places. She wore slightly more make-up than usual and a dress that she would never wear to work. It was a black sleeveless dress with a low cut V at the front which showed just a little peak of breast. It fell to her calf at the front and her heel at the back. She felt good and ready to have some fun. That night she was just Sam. Not Dr. Carter, Mrs. Shanahan or Mom.

As she stood talking with her friends, she noticed the blinking light of her Blackberry, signaling that a new e-mail had hit her in-box. It could have been from any one of a hundred people but, irrational as it was considering the short lapse in time, she knew it was from Jack. She pulled the device from her bag, opening the message as she did. She heard Janet speak over the din of music and conversation and looked up to hear her better.

"Woman, would ever stop working for once. This is a party, remember!"

Sam smiled at her, nodding her head to acknowledge the validity of the statement while wondering if this particular e-mail could be categorized as 'work'. She flicked her eyes back to the message and re-read it.

**_I don't know what sozzled is, but it sounds interesting._**

Even though she should have been annoyed that he hadn't answered her question as to his whereabouts, she smiled to herself, warmed by his response. Even though he had the ability to make her laugh when she most needed it, she realized that at that particular moment that wasn't the reason why she was smiling. She didn't know if it was her overly analytical mind, or the two cosmo's she'd already consumed, but she had a feeling that Jack was actually flirting with her.

She raised her face from the small screen and found herself looking directly into the twinkling chocolate brown eyes of the very man of whom she had been thinking. Jack was standing with a group of officers positioned right behind Janet's shoulder and Sam blushed as he looked down at the Blackberry in her hand and raised a questioning eyebrow at her.

Normally she would have simply looked away in embarrassment, considering she was a married woman and he was a married man, but inexplicably she didn't. Being around Jack O'Neill seemed to make her lose all traces of common sense and she quickly typed a response and pressed send. She turned away from his intense gaze, resuming her conversation, trying her best to ignore the curious looks her friends were sending her way.

At the same time, Jack felt the vibration of the message arriving against his belt and pulled it out knowing that it was Sam.

**_Stick around and you'll get to see sozzled in person_**

He chuckled and looked up with every intention of catching her eye but he was surprisingly disappointed to discover that her eyes were not where they had been. She had turned away from him and was now deep in cheerful conversation with members of his former team and the Doc. He unconsciously shrugged his shoulders and looked around the room for the next group he would join knowing that as General he would be expected to talk to every single person at the party.

TBC?


	4. More Christmas Party

**Chapter 4 – More Christmas Party**

For the remainder of the party, Sam did her best to avoid Jack. She'd come to the conclusion that he wasn't in fact flirting with her at all and any thoughts she'd had that led her to that original conclusion were purely alcohol induced imaginations. She felt ridiculous for even thinking that way. Someone like Jack O'Neill would never be interested in a geeky astrophysicist like her. And, she reminded herself, even if he was, she was a married woman who shouldn't be attracted to another man.

She made her way through the room ensuring that she spoke to scientists, civilians and military alike. And even though she definitely wasn't making a conscious effort, she knew where Jack was at all times. But she didn't speak to him and made sure that if he joined a group that she was already conversing with, she moved onto another set of people. This pattern continued until the party started winding down.

She was saying goodbye to Janet and Teal'c who were returning to base, Janet because she was on duty in just a few hours and Teal'c because he was planning to return to Chulak for the holidays. Even though he obviously didn't celebrate any of Earth's religious holidays, he had embraced it as a time to spend with family and those he loved. Jack must have noticed the farewells and made his way over to join them.

"Howdy campers", he started having had quite a few beers during his time at the party. "Leaving already?" he questioned looking around the entire group as he spoke. It was clear that the General wasn't asking a rhetorical question and the Doctor and Jaffa quickly explained their intentions. Jack nodded as he listened, remembering that he already knew what he was being told. Satisfied that his friend weren't leaving the festivities for what he considered to be frivolous reasons, like sleep, he turned his attention to the people who remained. He found Sam's eyes and held them.

"So, what do the rest of you have planned?" he asked, not waivering from the eye contact with his favorite scientist. Daniel noticed the interaction between them and waited, curious to see what Sam would say. Cam Mitchell, however, didn't appear to have Daniel's observation skills and he answered, oblivious to the implication that the question asked was in fact meant for Sam.

"Well, Sir, Sam and I are going to grab some dinner at the steak house with what's left of SG's 2 and 3".

"Really?" Jack asked, eyebrows raised in surprise. "Dr. Carter", he continued still looking at Sam intently, "you're going out with a bunch of flyboys and jarheads, eh?"

Disliking what she perceived to be the amusement Jack was taking in the conversation at her expense, she decided that two could play at that game.

"Yes I am. Why? Would you like to join us?"

He appeared to me momentarily taken aback by her comeback and simply turned his head away from her, making a show of looking around the bar at the people who remained.

"I'll try to make it. But there's still some folks here that I haven't had a chance to speak with. Sorry Sam but duty calls".

And with that parting shot, and a quick wink, Jack walked away. Sam quietly let out the breath she hadn't known she was holding and turned to Cam.

"Should we get going? From what I can see, the other teams have gone ahead of us", Sam asked realizing that both Daniel and Janet were watching her. Cam looked around nodding as he did.

"Yes Ma'am", he answered putting his arm out for her to take. Not knowing whether he did this because he was worried that she wouldn't make it up the stairs, or merely because he was a gentleman, wasn't her concern. She looped her arm through his and throwing her Goodbyes over her shoulder, let the leader of SG-1 walk her out of the bar.

Cam's finely tuned senses told him that they were being watched as they left but as he made the incorrect assumption that it was just the remainder of his team, he didn't turn around. If he had done so, he would have seen General Jack O'Neill staring at them, mixed emotions crossing his face. Within the space of five seconds, he showed surprise, jealousy, anger and finally rested with his usual impassive mask that he wore more often than not.

* * *

As she placed another bite of filet mignon into her mouth, she came to the conclusion that she was bored. It wasn't that she didn't like her team mates but she was wired from the alcohol in her system and something else that she couldn't put her finger on. Without a second thought, she put down her knife and fork and reached into her purse for he blackberry. She quickly typed a note to Jack and sent it. 

_**Where are you?**_

Sam went back to the conversation trying to figure out exactly which mission they were attempting to discuss in the SGC's own secret code. She left the device on the table her eyes flicking to it every few minutes to see if the light was blinking. She lost interest, however, when Colonel Feretti began recounting a particularly funny story that involved SG-1 from years before that involved Jack and some kind of alien cake.

Soon a type of game had evolved at the table the goal being to see who could tell the most outrageous Jack story, the only rule being that they couldn't mention anything that would breach Homeworld Security. Sam was captivated by all that he had been involved in prior to his promotion to General and finally, after being assigned to the SGC for seven months, she understood the level of admiration and respect the off-world teams had for their commander.

As the laughter was dying down, the waiter took advantage of the lull in conversation to present the dessert menu to the group. As she looked down at the list of sweets, Sam noticed the red light flashing out of the corner of her eye and opened the e-mail reply from Jack.

_**Sorry. Got stuck with a "sozzled" Daniel wanting to discuss off world affairs. Can you bring the guys to O'Malley's for an after dinner drink? My treat!**_

A broad grin spread across her lips as she read the words. Cam must have noticed the goofy expression she wore and called across the table.

"Hey Sam! What's made you so happy?"

Not realizing that her change in attitude had been so obvious her smile quickly turned into a frown

"Nothing", she snapped. She caught herself, knowing that she over-reacting and did her best to relax. "Well nothing really. It's just General O'Neill wants us to meet him at O'Malleys for a beer. His treat."

By the end of her sentence she was looking down at her menu, staring at it as if the most important decision in her future was making the right choice between Crème Brulee and chocolate cake. She told herself that tonight the cake was the winner and raised her head up to order. All the men at the table were staring at her, a couple were even open mouthed, literally.

"What?", she asked defensively.

"Nothing", Feretti answered, with a twinkle in his eye and a sly smile on his face. "It's just that the General doesn't normally issue an invitation like that so it has to be something to do with you. But it doesn't really matter. I think we should get the check and head to O'Malley's before he changes his mind. Anyone with me?"

The men around the table all nodded their agreement and looked at Sam for her answer.

She knew that she should go home. It was now well after midnight and Pete would be starting to worry but despite the nagging voice she could hear in the back of her head, she heard herself mutter one single word.

"Fine".

She grabbed her blackberry up of the table in dramatic fashion and dictated to the table as she typed.

_**Oh if we must! Be there in 10.**_

As Cam pulled out her chair, Sam stood and walked towards the exit with seven of the bravest men in the Universe in search of their drunken fearless leader.

TBC

* * *

A/N To everyone who took the time to review the last chapter, you are wonderful. Honestly if it wasn't for you all, I probably wouldn't have continued (or at least not until real life calmed down). So thanks to everyone who reads and to those of you who review, you are who inspire me to write faster! And for tjose of you who are concerned, I always do my best to ensure that everyone stays in character so take from that what you will in relation to where this plot will go. 


	5. Replicators

Chapter 5 – Replicators

All Sam knew was noise. Noise and pain. Unfortunately, she couldn't isolate the cause of either and desperately tried to remember where she was exactly. What planet? What mission? It was obvious that she'd been captured and was being tortured but she could remember nothing. Even though she was lying face down unable to open her eyes, she could still hear a high pitched noise and, yes, there it was again. Pain.

Suddenly her arm was pulled and then pushed. Again. And again. The jerking movement caused her head to move and the resulting pain was excruciating. She fought back the vomit that rose in her throat, concentrating on the noise that accompanied the violence. The pattern kept repeating. A variation on the same theme but they were repeating in a fashion none the less. Words? Could they be words?

She instinctively knew that if she had any chance of surviving this hell, she had to figure out what her captors were trying to communicate to her. And so she drew on every ounce of her being, every piece of training the military had afforded her, and blocked out the pain the best she could. She focused on the sound and realized that her instincts had been correct. It was a voice, a high-pitched one at that, prompting her to try to narrow down which of their enemies it could be. Definitely not G'oauld or Jaffa. Doubtful it could be anything to do with the Lucian Alliance. The Ori? Unlikely. Without a frame of reference as to which planet she was on, she was left with nothing but confusion.

And the repetition of the words continued. She focused on the pattern. Word one. Word one. Word two, word three. Word one. Word two. Word three. Word one. Word one. Word one.

Sam's brain screamed out for the torture to stop and finally so did she.

"Stop! Oh please stop."

Her outburst had left her nauseous and shaking. She thought her head was going to explode from the violent bursts of pain that cut through her like shards of broken glass. As she breathed through the queasiness that enveloped her, and the pain began to subside a little, she became aware that the noise had stopped. She stilled and listened hard. She couldn't hear anything but she sensed that her captor was standing beside her. Sam thought that he would leave but she didn't hear any movement.

And as quickly as it had stopped, the voice started again. Only this time the words were being whispered instead of shouted.

Word one. Word two. Word three. At this quieter level Sam thought she would be able to at least decipher the sounds, so she concentrated on listening, blocking out all her other senses when the pattern began again.

Word one. Word two. Word three. Mommy. Word two. Word three. Mommy. Wake. Up.

Confusion and fear filled Sam. Who were these beings that could make her think that her daughter was with her. Replicators?

Oh God. That's why her head hurt so much she concluded and once again, bile rose up but this time not from the pain, but from the fear that consumed her. She had to get out of this situation. She had to find a way out of the cell in which they were holding her. She just had to open her eyes first. And so she did.

The light that hit her increased the pain tenfold but she knew that she couldn't close them again. Squinting slightly, she tried her best to focus. And then she saw it, standing right in front of her. A perfect replica of her five year old daughter, Emily, from her beautiful big, bright blue, eyes to her blond hair, falling to her shoulders in curls.

"Good Morning, Mommy", she said and broke into the most beautiful, heart-breaking smile Sam had ever seen. And she was terrified. She moved her head slightly to get a better look at the room and swallowed hard. It was a perfect reproduction of her bedroom showing amazing detail down to the make-up she had strewn on her dresser the night before.

"What do you want?" she managed to ask.

"I want you to get up Mommy".

"Why? Why me?" Sam murmured, desperately holding back the sobs fighting to escape.

The "child" looked thoughtful for a moment, choosing its words carefully.

"Daddy said that you were naughty last night. You went to a party and had too much beer. You stayed up way past your bedtime. Daddy told me to wake you up to get me dressed because it serves you right that you have an over hang".

And it was at that moment that reality hit Sam like a speeding train. She wasn't off-world. She was at home in her bedroom and the child that stood before her really was her little girl. Somewhere downstairs, banging doors very loudly, was Pete, her husband, who was obviously really pissed about the night before.

But what about last night? She searched her brain through the pain to remember what she had done the night before. She could recollect the Christmas Party. She remembered a steak dinner with some of the SG teams, the very thought of which made her stomach turn once more. But what happened after that? Where had she gone and with whom?

As she laid thinking, she became aware of a fuzzy cotton wool feeling in her mouth. A sweet taste mixed with the fuzz. Oh God! Cosmopolitans.

She rushed to get to the bathroom gently pushing Emily out of the way as she ran. She emptied the contents of her stomach, which included a large amount of vodka, into the toilet bowl, retching again and again, all the while hearing her daughter frantically calling out.

"Daddy, Daddy, quick! Mommy's really sick. Mommy's going blah in the toilet. Come quick!"

Sam sat back on her haunches, wiping her mouth and nose with toilet paper. She rested, exhausted, against the cold tile and thought of only one thing.

She was going to kill Jack O'Neill when she got her hands on him.


End file.
